ARRRAAAAHHHH!!!! It hurts!!! I've been sitting here trying to push out what feels like a baby-sized English paper and feeling like my eyeballs are going to explode all over my computer screen. Why is this so difficult?!?! Three years ago I could have whipped a decent paper out in three hours or so. I have been working on this paper for three DAYS. AAAAAARRRRRRRRHHHHHHHHHH!!!!

Okay, I think I blame public education. How else has my writing gotten worse over the past four years? Clearly someone got their curriculum a little mixed up. Somewhere they're sitting at their desk going, "OHHHH, we were supposed to make them better at writing, not bring down their IQs." Realizing this sooner would have saved me a lot of undue trouble right now.

Albert Einstein once said, "It is a miracle that curiosity survives formal education." He was spot on.

It explains why I'm having so much trouble deciding what to do in college. I have way too many interests, but every time I start thinking I might be interested in one thing, I take a class on it, and end up losing interest completely. It really does murder curiostiy. Will this be different in college? I really hope so. I don't want to be stuck in a place as devoted to delivering an average education as my high school seems to be. If I had a quarter for every time someone told me I try too hard or I'm a perfectionist, I would fill a large, heavy sack and use it to whack the person over the head with, and in doing so hopefully explain to them it was they were just not trying hard enough. When I get to a college, I want to feel like the norm, NOT the overachiever. I am not an overachiever. I'm what every student should be. I want to do well based on my own standard, without feeling self-conscious of how hard I work because everyone my age is out getting drunk and conveniently "forgetting" to study for that big exam tomorrow.

If only a person could live on art...life would be colorful and new...and I'd never have to write an English paper again.